Is Humility a Strategy or a Virtue?
Today’s Gospel reading offers a lesson in humility. It is expressed in the parable of Jesus that advises that one should not try to sit at the head of table, but rather at the lowest place because then the host could ask one to move higher instead of vice versa. Of course, Jesus’ parable may give the impression that the sitting at the lower position is a clever ruse to get a higher place later. But this teaching that the first will be last and the last will be first (e.g. Matthew 19:30 and 20:16) is one that Jesus has repeated several times in the Gospels. A similar theme is also seen in the parable of the Pharisee and the Publican (Luke 18:9-14). So although Jesus does explain what may happen when one puts oneself last instead of first, he obviously sees this virtue of putting oneself last as more than just a strategy.
But the truth is that although humility is often seen as a virtue that we must all practice, it is true that for many, the underlying, perhaps hidden, reason for this is either because it seems socially unacceptable to praise oneself too much, or to prevent the fall that pride brings with it. And so perhaps many wear their humility like a cloak that protects them from this fall - so that even when we feel we are more successful than others, or more good-looking than others, or better than others in this or that way, we do not boast about it because at the back of our mind there is a lurking fear that perhaps too much gloating about such things may, in some unknown way, end up in such things being suddenly taken away from us. The practice of doing something to prevent the evil eye, which is found in many cultures, is built on this fear.
Coming back to this desire to somehow see ourselves as a little better than at least some others, it would seem that this is perhaps a deep need within all human beings. Even the disciples of Jesus showed this in their behaviour as they argued among themselves as to who would be greater in the Kingdom of Heaven (Luke: 9 46). In fact two of them (James and John) even had their mother coming to ask Jesus to give them the most preferred seats in his kingdom (Mathew 20: 20-21). To take an example from India’s unhappy caste system, even today it is a reality that even among the 'outcastes', or the excluded castes, there is a hierarchy, so that the higher of the excluded castes will look down with disdain on the one’s who are socially even lower than them among the various other 'outcastes'.
But today’s gospel seems to be teaching us that being truly humble is possible only when we come to believe that it is OK to be at the bottom of the table - not as a strategy but because one is comfortable with oneself. If I am OK with being at the bottom of the table - whether it is the table of respect or wealth or success or beauty or whatever else - it means I am OK with being myself, wherever I am at the table. Another person’s expensive clothes do not become aspirational because I am happy with my own; the respect another commands doesn’t bother me because I respect myself; another’s great beauty doesn’t make me feel small because I am comfortable with my own looks and body; and so on and so forth. And when I reach that stage where I am truly OK with being anywhere on that table, I begin to even value things differently, based on their own intrinsic value and not in comparison to anybody or anything else. And as today’s Gospel reading suggests, I will feel comfortable mixing with people of all classes and types, and not only with those of a ‘higher’ class or type, because I don’t feel the need to rub shoulders with these ‘better’ ones in the hope that their standing rubs off on me. Nor do I think I will be lowered in my own self-value if I mix with those who are allegedly in the eyes of society ‘lower’ than me. The gifts I then give, as the Gospel hints at in the last part, are not a pay-back of what I got, or what I hope to get in the future, or even to keep a certain social standing, but given from a real personal connection, from the value I place on that particular relationship.
But how do we practice being OK with being at the bottom of the table? Of course, it requires a great amount of self-worth, and that is not really something we can conjure up easily. I do not have any easy answers. It is true that in some ways we are not as good as others and that may make us feel small. But perhaps, if instead of comparing ourselves with others, we focus on ourselves and becoming better than what we are currently, we may find that a lot of the things we think are important, are not really so important, because we have no one to be better than. And in the things that do matter, we may find that our journey to becoming better gives us more joy and peace without the comparisons to weigh us down. Furthermore, I think Jesus’ mantra of putting oneself last helps. Because often putting oneself at the bottom of the table, without debasing ourselves, or even valuing ourselves any less, we learn to be comfortable with ourselves without the crutch of titles, honours and labels. We can then be our authentic selves, not the masks we often put on.
First Reading: Sirach 3: 17-18, 20, 28-29
My child, perform your tasks with humility;
then you will be loved by those whom God accepts.
The greater you are, the more you must humble yourself;
so you will find favor in the sight of the Lord.
For great is the might of the Lord;
but by the humble he is glorified.
Neither seek what is too difficult for you,
nor investigate what is beyond your power.
Reflect upon what you have been commanded,
for what is hidden is not your concern.
When calamity befalls the proud, there is no healing,
for an evil plant has taken root in him.
The mind of the intelligent appreciates proverbs,
and an attentive ear is the desire of the wise.
Second Reading: Hebrews 12: 18-19, 22-24
You have not come to something that can be touched, a blazing fire, and darkness, and gloom, and a tempest, and the sound of a trumpet, and a voice whose words made the hearers beg that not another word be spoken to them. (For they could not endure the order that was given, “If even an animal touches the mountain, it shall be stoned to death.” Indeed, so terrifying was the sight that Moses said, “I tremble with fear.”)
But you have come to Mount Zion and to the city of the living God, the heavenly Jerusalem, and to innumerable angels in festal gathering, and to the assembly of the firstborn who are enrolled in heaven, and to God the judge of all, and to the spirits of the righteous made perfect, and to Jesus, the mediator of a new covenant, and to the sprinkled blood that speaks a better word than the blood of Abel.
Gospel: Luke 14: 1, 7-14
On one occasion when Jesus was going to the house of a leader of the Pharisees to eat a meal on the sabbath, they were watching him closely.
When he noticed how the guests chose the places of honor, he told them a parable. “When you are invited by someone to a wedding banquet, do not sit down at the place of honor, in case someone more distinguished than you has been invited by your host; and the host who invited both of you may come and say to you, ‘Give this person your place,’ and then in disgrace you would start to take the lowest place. But when you are invited, go and sit down at the lowest place, so that when your host comes, he may say to you, ‘Friend, move up higher’; then you will be honored in the presence of all who sit at the table with you. For all who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”
He also said to the one who had invited him, “When you give a luncheon or a dinner, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or rich neighbors, in case they may invite you in return, and you would be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind. And you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you, for you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.”
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